Much is said about the 5th Beatle but you hear very little if nothing at all about the 4th Wise Man. It's as if he's been wiped off the face of the earth. So, just to put the record straight for those of you who don't know who he was or where he came from I implore you to read on - because, that's what I did!
The Boring Bit
We know the Bible gives us the direction, East and the legend states that the 3 wise men were from Persia (Iran) - Balthasar, Melchior, Caspar - thus being priests of Zarathustra religion, the 'mages' or as we know them, The Magi. Obviously the pilgrimage had some religious significance for these men, otherwise they would not have taken the trouble and risk of travelling so far. They came bearing wonderous gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh.
(Gold (left) Frankincense (Bottom) Myrrh (Top) Go on admit it - you've never ever seen all 3 on the same picture. Infact, you're quite amazed that they should look like that. Except for the gold that is!Ooh and doesn't frankincense look like some tripe!)
A Bit Less Boring Than the first Bit
Though if you ask most people what they'd like today they'd say "Easy on the myrrh and frankinstein just pop the gold under the tree with the rest of the prezzies and be on your way; oh you shouldn't have!"
Another Boring Bit
But what became of the 4th Wise Man you're all asking? We didn't even know there was a 4th Wise man, you're having us on. Well, read on and come to your own conclusions.
Medium Boring
So, why isn't he ever mentioned. Well, one theory is that his prezzie was the best of all and being a Westerner and not one of their clique they didn't warm to the idea of being usurped by a lesser mortal so to speak. To put it another way it's a bit like spending the whole morning slaving over the cooker preparing a mega Sunday dinner with all the trimmings and someone waltzes into the kitchen to make the gravy and then gets credit for the whole flaming dinner! So, let's cut to the chase and reveal all. Coming to the end of their journey the 3 wise men stopped off at a travel inn just outside Bethlehem (No, not 'the' travel inn they weren't around then). It was in this inn that they bumped into this Welsh guy called Wayne. When they got talking Casper asked him what brings him to these parts, as you do. Well Wayne naturally blurbed -
"I've come all this way to see the son of god innit. They say he'll be able to walk on water and all that a bit like Barry John who plays outside half for Wales. Wos at you got in your bags it don't half stink!"
On hearing this the Wise men cajoled him into displaying his gift.
"Issa bewtyful andpainted resin pair of Budgies innit. Hand crafted in China see. Look, hey've even got em perched on one of vose lookylikey trees!"
On seeing this the Wise Men were alarmed knowing instantly that their gifts would look shameful and paltry against this priceless masterpiece. So,that night, they conspired as they sat by the fire to arrange unafraid the plans that they made, camelling in a wintry far off land.
In other words, knowing that Wayne was Welsh and he couldn't resist a bevvy or fourteen they conspired to get him completely bladdered that night so that he'd have such a hangover the next day he wouldn't be able to get out of bed enabling them to arrive at the Son of God first.
Wayne, the 4th Wise Man came from Treherbert in the Rhondda. Legend has it he was a broken man after that. He was never seen again but settled in Ibiza where he opened a bar.
And the moral of this story is:
Don't worry butty it was the thought that counted!
And, just for all you out there who think it but don't ever say it the cartoon below is for you! (If you click on the pic it links to the cartoonist's site)
Merry Christmas Blogland!